joy, a day late

i forgot the days of the week

What happened to the 14th installment of “Week in Joy” was simply this: I didn’t realize it was Sunday until after 3pm, when I decided it was too late to write and publish a newsletter. I would like to say I thought it was Saturday, as that might be plausible, but the truth is I really did not know what day it is. When you are home roughly 90% of your team, the days have a way of melding together just like they did during the pandemic. There are no more days of the week; time is just something that flows for me now, unbroken by sunrises and sunsets. I don’t sleep anymore. I don’t know what day it is unless I look at a calendar and sometimes that happens deep into the afternoon and so I missed the Sunday column.

However! I am here a day late and I have looked at the calendar already and it is Monday, July 24, 2023 at 5:38am to be precise. I am thinking about what brought me joy last week and let me tell you, when you are housebound (for the most part), the joys come few and far between. That doesn’t mean life is sad or bad, it just means it was a mundane week. And that’s ok. I’ve had too many things happening lately, and a week of relative calm was nice.

Sometimes I have to go through my camera roll to remember what I did during the week. Sometimes I rely on my increasingly shoddy memory. Sometimes I have a story to tell about my joys, sometimes, I’ve just got a list.

• I finished a jigsaw puzzle, which felt like a great accomplishment. I immediately started another and bought two more. I think I found my new hobby

• Finished another book (Sell Out by Dan Ozzi) and started another, which will go unnamed for now and will be the subject of a newsletter essay later on

• I was approved for four more weeks of sick leave. Doc said I need that time to stay off my leg and let it heal. Ok, you have no argument from me

• I listened to the Violent Femmes first album four times this week. It’s such a good record and I’m always in a good mood while listening to it

• Natalie is coming to visit two weeks from today and that is bringing me untold joy. Can’t wait to spend some valuable time with her sitting on the couch watching Billy Madison or yelling at the Yankees

• The Yankees have put together a three game win streak and I’m hoping they are back

• The weather has been gross. Humidity is the worst. But one good thing about being stuck at home is I am escaping almost the entire summer, which is a good thing

That’s a pretty good list for a week in which I laid low. I am finding myself more and more looking for the good things, and trying to keep a positive attitude. It hasn’t been easy, what with (gestures widely) everything that has happened since 2020. Just a continuous shitshow. Yet somehow I’ve been in a good mood lately. I feel like I’ve just had so much shit happen that nothing can hurt me anymore. All I can do is laugh at anyone or anything that tries to bring me down. When I fell and fractured my leg and I heard that “pop” is when I think I finally snapped. I sat on the the ground, my leg screaming in pain, and I laughed and said “you ‘ve got to be fucking kidding me.” I just accepted my fate. I really hate the saying “it is what it is” but sometimes it is appropriate. There’s nothing I can do to change anything that happened. I just have to go with it, and hope the future is better, and search for the joy.

Have a great week. I promise not to lose track of the days again.