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I'm lucky in that I have an actual doctor's excuse from a cardiologist that says I shouldn't have any contact with my ex-wife :)

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Dates and anniversaries are how human beings mark important events. Though I've been married for 8+ years, I still remember the dates when my ex- did things to or with me. I remember dates that hurt or gave me joy. I remember the wounds and the healing. It's what makes me human, I suppose.

What I appreciate is that I've been able to put things into perspective. I can remember things without going into a tailspin. They're events that are part of my life, and they're not going to go away. What's more, I don't want them to go away, because they're part and parcel of who I am. They help me to appreciate where and who I am. Without those nicks and bumps and bruises, I'd be very different and far more shallow.

It's not the years, it's the miles.

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